Every relationship develop problems over time. The most important thing is how you work together to solve / overcome them. One may say that the most important things in a relationship are: trust, communication, love and honesty. If you find that your relationship lack any of these components then your relationship might be subjected to problems.
Trust
This is important in order to have a healthy relationship. Lets face it, if no trust exist between you and your partner, there will be MORE arguments and MORE anger...these may in turn lead to a very bad environment to live in or a bad person to be around... issues such as ABUSE and DEPRESSION may develop. Its ok to have doubts a bit, but lack of trust entirely can prove to be detrimental to one's health, relationship and well-being.
Communication
What is a relationship without communication? it wouldnt be a relationship in the first place. Lets face it, your partner has to know how you feel and why you feel that way.
Love
If there is a relationship without love, then it makes no sense to continue. This is why most married couples in up with a divorce, they get tired of eachother and the love is simple not there anymore. Love is vital to every relationship else it will crash and burn.
Honesty
Why would you lie to the person that you claim you love soo much? it just does not make sense. If you respect your partner, you would tell them the truth, no matter how much it hurts, the truth will eventually set you free.
Hence, it is imperative that all these factors are included in your relationship in order to extend its life span. Remember, looks is what initiates the relationship, but personality keeps its goin ;)
Believe it or not, everyone has family problems. Whether it is financially, emotionally or physically, every family goes through some sort of problem. The trick is to count your blessings, at least you have a family because many do not. The main way to get over the depression of existing in a family that has problem [that is, every family, because every family has problems] is to sit and talk about it. sometimes, family members do not even know that you are being troubled by something that is family orientated. How will they know if you do not speak up? do not sit and wallow in depression and always remember that though times never last but tough people do. If the problem is with finance, you can seek to attain a job to help out yourself and possibly other family members. If the problem is about emotions, seek to get help from a counsellor or a member of the church. remember to report abuse whether it be verbal abuse or physical abuse because over time it will still persist and get worst. No one should have to adhere to any physical misdemeanor.
Although this may stand as a major issue on its own, there can be numerous contributors to the problem of keeping up with new fashion trends. One such contributor is peer pressure while, to a lesser extend, the unability to FUND new purchases. In recent times, the way an individual dress can determine how he/ she is classed socially. This is evident in both adults and teens, however, the need to "fit in" may impact a teens eagerness to be fashion forward even more so than an adult. Like music, fashion changes almost everyday and one may find it extremely hard to keep up with whats hot TODAY. In the song "yellow brick road" by Eminem [my favourite singer], Mr.eminem described his childhood being a white kid in a black environment [no racism intended]. He then went on to state how he was cool one day and then the next day at school a new shoes was the "in thing".
My first year in 9th grade, can't forget that day at school
It was cool till your man MC Shan came through
And said that Puma's The Brand 'cause the clan makes troops
It was rumors but man, god damn, they flew
Must've been true because man we done banned they shoes
I had the new ones the Cool J, Ice land swayed too
And we just through them in the trash like they yesterday's news
Guess who came through next, X-clan debut
Professor X vanglorious exists in a state of red, black, and green
With a key sissies now with this being a new trend
We don't fit in crackers is out with Cactus albums
And lets be realistic, there is no way you can be a fashion forward person if you cannot afford to shop on a regular basis. An awesum tip is so buy expensive durable clothes instead of cheap easy to be destroyed ones. In conclusion, fashion keeps changing, so if you are not with it, you are behind it...but dont let it get you down. its just clothes people....aint life more important??
Although some teens get everything they want from their parents, there are some of us who really have to work hard in order to get money especially in the summer when you want to go have fun with your friends. Lets face it, money is a necessity and with careful planning, it can be earned really fast. You can get money by getting a weekend job or a summer job. Its quite easy, just write a resume and an application letter and then drop it off at different firms/ store/ you name it. Make sure to send applications to different places in order to heighten your chances of being employed. By getting job, this increases the level of respect that your parents have for you and also independence. Trust me. Nothing tried, nothing gained.
Hi guys, today was a very tiresome one for me but I decided to come online to speak about another teen issue, that is, the issue of 'independence'. According to the internet, independence is freedom from dependence on or control by another person, organization or state. To be dependent on one's parents is to need or rely on them for help or support especally financially. This is an issue that undoubtedly every teen has to face, most if not all. Some parents, however, exceed the boudaries to which they can control a teen's life these parents are classified as being "over protective". Research as shown that the parents of a female will be more controllive than that of a male. This does not mean that a girl's parents CARE more, but rather, out of fear of how men view women in today's society a parent would try to protect his/ her child from abuse [mentally or physically], from an unwanted pregnancy etc. Furthermore, it is also evident that it is when these parents are "too protective" that their child will be "curious" or "rebellious" to HIDE and do the very same things that these parents were trying so very hard to prevent. We, as teens, are human beings. We have feelings just like any adult and [some] of us are even WISE enough to make our own decisions [wise decisions]. Sure, many will have to learn the hard way but the fact of the matter is that eventually they will learn. So parents need not try to protect their parents from watever they think they are protecting them from because eventually they will come in contact with it or be in that situation [unless that teen is literally going to be locked in a cage]. A wise parent, however, would teach their teen to protect THEMSELF because it is physically impossible for a parent to ALWAYS be there to protect their teen. For these teens with overtly strict parents, i would advise that you just listen to what your parents have to say, let them be right because when you go OUT there in the world and something bad happens to you, they will be the one laughing and dont you dare let them win this race. So take the arguments with a closed mouth. obey etc. Eventually it will all end. Because in the end, it will be alright, so if it is not alright, then it is simply not the end.
Independence is an achievement that is also gained with age. A teen may find that as he or she grows older, their parents will be less strict about protection and those things. They will come to the realization that their teen is infact growing up and will soon be ready to leave the nest.
Do not behave "wild" and expect your parents to give you freedom. Come on people. Think. The thought of you drunk in jail after a party is enough to send any parent to hell and back. Show your parents that you can make WISE decisions and they will trust you more hence, giving you independence.
Subsequently, it is literally their JOB to make sure that you have food, clothing and shelter. A parent can serve hard time for neglecting a child. And after soooo many years of investing in school supplies and the basic commodities of life!!! a parent wants to make sure that their child turns out to be a responsible adult. Being protective and controllive will help to avoid danger or any deterrent to this aim. So be a good sport. So, to end this disscussion, I will ask the question....
What would life be like if you had all the freedom in the world? and how would this "freedom" affect your future? would you still be in school? would you turn to a life of crime? post your comments below.
Hey guys! so i decided to ask people from my school about problems that they face on a everyday basis as teenagers. Upon conducting surveys, interviews etc, I found out that MOST of the problems that affect persons in my age group [teenagers] are:
Peer pressure
Lack of independence from parents
Getting a job
Getting money
Keeping up with fashion
Family problems
Relationship problems
Sex
School pressure
etc.....
I will try to deal with these issues separately because sometimes not all problems are linked/ intertwined. Lets first examine the issue of PEER PRESSURE.
I,myself, am a victim of this disease. [it's not actually a disease people -_-]. But at times I want to fit in and be part of whatever the "group" is doing. After all, they are your friends, so why not do the things they do?
I interviewed a friend who prefers to go by the name of "TEZ" and this is what he had to say about this issue.
Pookie: what are some of the issues you face a s a teenage boy?
Tez: Peer Pressure [thinks for a long while]....[looks around the room]...I do not work so I have to ask my parents all the time for money and that affects me because I want to be independent.
Pookie: How does peer pressure and this lack of independence intertwine?
Tez: Because in order to be independent you gotta have financial "backitive" to do stuff with your friends for example going out and buying clothes to go out etc etc.
Pookie: So what do you try to do in order to solve these problems?
Tez: I try to save my lunch money and do odd jobs around the house like painting and stuff.
Pookie: what do you think is easier to get rid of, the peer pressure or the lack of independence?
Tez: lack of independence because with age you get more responsible hence your parents will treat you differently and give you space to be yourself. However, no matter how old you get, you will always have friends who influence your thoughts and activities.
Pookie: what advice would you give teenagers with similar problems such as peer pressure and lack of independence?
Tez: don't let your friends' way of life influence you in everyway, try to choose what is best for you. And in terms of lack of independence, just try to be responsible and independence will follow. once your parents realize that you are getting older and making wise choices then independence should follow.
Wise words coming from my friend "Tez". oh! and if you need more friend check out this video on how to get friends. but just do not let them influence you alot!!
EDIT: could not find the video i wanted :( but i hope this one helped too. In conclusion, here are a few tips on how to actually deal with peer pressure!!!!! :D 1. Be a leader, not a follower [except on twitter yall!! follow me! "paula_twinkle"] 2. Share your views with members of the group. how will they know you do not like something if you do not tell them? chances are, they will consider your point and realize its no worth doing watever it is in the first place. 3. Say "NO". its so simple. Someone can not FORCE you to do something that you do not want to do. it is against the law and they can go to jail etc etc. 4. Talk to someone else about what is going on in the group. If you talk to a fellow group member, they wouldnt think its wrong. so its best to talk to someone who is not apart of the group. 5. get new friends!! If you realize that your friends are not the type of people you should be hanging out with, get new friends. its free!!!
When everyone else turns their back on you, family will always be there to comfort you. In the teenage years its likely that your family will seem like the last resort for discussing matters or even simple happiness!!! your brother becomes the most annoying person in the world! and your sister just don't know when to quit! there will seem to be pure hate within you, so much that you would hurt the person and then [most likely] regret it!! Not to mention the "rents"!! [parents].
For some teens, parents play a integral role in their social life. Their parents would sit and have one on one convos with them or even spend those "quality times" with them. For others, the thought of being that close to the parental unit is just as scary as justin beiber without clothes! [not a beiber fan]. And then there are those few who want....no...need to be close to their parents but simply cannot. For those of you out there who fall predominantly in this category,here are a few tips to initiate that new parent-child relationship:
1. get involved with tasks: help a parent move an item or fix something that is broken. this is likely to start a conversation which will open the door for growth in a relationship.
2. Ask questions: How will you know what is on their mind if you do not ask questions? you can start by asking how their day went and then move unto current affairs, finally, asking personal questions.
3. laugh more often: laughing at a parent's joke will let them feel younger and more open to the idea of being close with you on those terms.
4. show appreciation: buy a small gift to show how much you appreciate your parent in your life. after all, here today, gone tomorrow.
5.Watch tv together and discuss the issues that are happening.
So there. being a teen and a loving member of the family isn't quite that hard. and remember this is all just a phase. Take care of yourself, and each other.
Well, everyone gets depressed at some point in their life. whether its because of their family, financial problems or just the feeling of being alone, we all feel the symptoms of if. Personally, i get depressed alot. So often that sometimes I think I'm bipolar! and it really puts a strain on my relationship sometimes but luckily I was blessed with a kind and understanding bf. After researching [i do that alot....he thinks am crazy], i found out 5 ways to cope with depressing. It may not be as effective the first time you try these steps but after regular practice you will find that you are happy and healthy.
Step 1: Get Educated about Depression
Yes, it starts right there. Learn about depression and how it affect your body, how you can cure it etc etc. You gotta understand the condition before you can treat it. Think like a doctor.
Step 2: Be optimistic
Person with depression sometimes feel hopeless. trust me. happens to me all the time. Learn that you are the one in control of you destiny!
Step 3: Get away!
If it's a particular person or matter that is making you depressed, you need to get away from that negative energy. and while away from it, do things to occupy your time to get you mind off it. which brings us to...
Step 4: Get Busy [lol]
Persons who have lots of stuff to do, don't have time to be depressed. when you get involved in something, you will concentrate on that and hence, will not have time to wallow in thoughts. For example;playing a sport, managing a blog etc.
Step 5: Talk about it
Chances are, not many persons know how you feel inside, you might try to hide how you feel from the world. But you need to get all those feelings out. Talk to someone you can trust or someone to whom you are very close.
hope these tips helped. and also try wearing bright colours and surrounding yourself with bright colours.
~pookie
So i was surfing around the net [like i always do] just looking for stuff to occupy my time when i came upon this video on videojug.com [a website that teaches you how to do things]. So i watched this video, about losing weight in a short amount of time and i tried it and it really worked!!! I am not a fat person, by the way nothing is wrong with being fat! just putting that out there, but i would indeed love to TONE my body. so i tried it and it worked. The trick is drinking WATER! cold, pure water.
How it works!
That so-called fat you see jiggling on you body is not actually fat! its "water weight". Actual fat is FIRM. Your body is simply making an effort to store as much water as possible because maybe you do not drink enough of it. so by drinking more water, your body wont have to rely on its mechanisms to store it. You might find that you pee more often after trying this technique, but that's a good thing! so if you are interested. try it. you have nothing to lose but weight. :)
love
~pookie
Hey everyone! my name is Pookie and I have created this blog to help you survive the teenage phase of your life. Yes, it might seem difficult and its like everything that can go wrong is actually going wrong but dont sweat. You got this. I,myself, am a teenager. I am a 17yr old female currently living in the caribbean. Yes! like you, i go through alot of stuff. unimaginable stuff. but hopefully, my experiences will help you survive yours and you will realize that being a teen is just a phase, you'll get pass it and its not that difficult to survive.
